So today was one of those days where I didn’t eat breakfast until 7:30 pm. Literally got to my desk & didn’t look up until just now. Anyways, now that I ate breakfast, let’s get to posting:)

Lately I’ve been having a very hard time getting myself to the gym. I’m a 5-6 days a week worker outer. Lately, it’s been barely 2-3. My alarm goes off at 5 am and I literally cannot get out of bed. And even if I’m awake I need to use serious self talk to convince myself to “just go.”

Here’s a typical self talk situation for me…“Just go to the gym Nicole, you’ll feel so much better if you do. Just go. You packed your bag for work last night, just go. But i’m so tired. And how will my hair look if I go? Nicole, you’re awake, just go. You know what, it’s probably better for my health if i get another couple hours of sleep, so i’ll get back in bed and just go after work. Or actually how about i don’t go to the gym but I just eat super super healthy today like literally not even a single piece of chocolate. Actually i think i hear rain. if it’s raining i def cannot go…..back to bed i go.”

Even though in the moment it feels so good to reset my alarm and get back into bed, I get down on myself for consistently turning off my alarm and skipping my workout.

Since I have always been a morning person, I have accepted that if I don’t go to the gym in the morning, I’m not going which is another reason the decision to get up is so crucial. Although I’ll pack my gym clothes for moral support in the slight chance I leave work early enough to get a quick barre class in on the way home.

Yesterday I was babysitting my nephew and the poor little guy was having a rough day. At around 4 pm I thought I’d take him for a walk to calm him down in his stroller. I put on my running shoes, a Lululemon hoodie & was ready to walk. He was calm and sleepy for about 1/2 mile and then he wasn’t.  I pulled the stroller over and took him out. He was happy as a lark being outside in my arms but he wanted nothing to do with that stroller. So we walked home, him in my right arm and me pushing the empty stroller with my left. Not gonna lie, I was breaking quite a sweat holding his little 11 pound body for a 1/2 mile walk. We got home, I did a couple squats with him to keep playing outside before it was time for him to eat. While my husband fed him I decided to continue with a workout I’d unintentionally started.

I ran for 3 miles straight. I was kind of shocked too.  With running, it either freakin sucks or you feel amazing. There is no in between. When it sucks, 1 minute of running feels like an eternity. For me, not having run any type of distance for a good two years I was surprised that 3 miles felt like a breeze. And it was enjoyable. Actually, I could have completed 4 but the rain got fairly heavy and since I had zero intentions of washing my hair this week,  more than a drizzle wasn’t going to fly. #priorities

So that got me thinking…did you ever notice that some days working out is easy and doesn’t feel like an obligation? and other days it feels so daunting?

What if we only went to the gym or exercised when it felt easy & not like an obligation? Why force ourselves to go when it just doesn’t feel right that day? Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to do it all, every single day. Eat right, workout, get enough sleep, drink enough water and volunteer for the Pismo Beach Disaster Relief. (Clueless reference)

It’s no wonder the gym feels daunting, it’s found it’s way onto a laundry list of other obligations.

I’m trying to accept if I have a day where it’s not happening, I’m going to accept it and move on. Right around the corner is a day where it won’t be hard. And I’ll actually enjoy it. So in the end, it will all balance itself out.

And let’s just call a spade a spade, gym or no gym, I’m still coming home and eating raw cookie dough.