Lets talk about regret. Regret is something we all feel possibly daily. Maybe even hourly. We regret certain things we said, things we did and of course things we ate.
I started thinking about regret on Sunday morning. I was out for my BFFs birthday. As I was drinking and catching up friends I don’t see often I forgot about dinner. Fast forward to 1 am when my friends and I decided to leave the bar. Instead of my husband and I just getting in an Uber and going home we went with our friends to get pizza. After all, it’s not until the second you stop drinking that you realize you’re STARVING. So I found myself eating a large slice of chicken and broccoli pizza. Then proceeded to help my friend Sandi finish off her slice of Mac and Cheese Pizza.
Now, it’s bad enough when you wake up and get the first remembrance that you are hung over when the room is spinning. Then as you quickly rack your brain to try and recall how much you actually drank you also remember what you ATE after you drank in the midst of those calculations. In my case pizza. An extra large slice to keep this post accountable.
Back in the day aka college, it was normal to wake up with regret from drinking. What did I do? What did I say? Where are my keys I lost my phone? This is coming from a girl who threw up the first night she ever went out with her husband. ( yup, he was a gem then and a gem now) However, it was acceptable in college to wake up feeling that way because there was always something to blame it on… the ah ah ah ah alcohol (T-Pain rap song reference circa 2009). Any and all late night pizza or Chinese eating could also be attributed to the alcohol. The good ole days.
For some reason it’s not that easy anymore. Why? Because I feel like I should know better. At 1 am, under the influence or not, I knew at that moment I had two choices: get in an uber and go to bed or eat pizza, get in a uber and go to bed. I obviously choose the latter. In the moment it felt fine BUT my major question now is did the pizza I ate outweigh the regret I felt the next morning? Basically which would I rather… A slice of pizza or a bloated regretful next day? Honestly I’m not sure the answer.
I woke up this morning with this text message. When I thought of my answer, it helped me just as much as it helped the person whom I received the text from.
Dear Abby/Dear Monday Dieter,
- Why are holiday dinners basically an all you can eat fest and by the end you realize you probably had about 5 combined dinners in one sitting?
- Is it socially awkward to stop eating after first course, even though ur already full?
- Do you feel bad from all of the work and time the cook put into making the meal?
- Do you feel pressure since everyone else still seems to be eating and clearly not struggling like you are?
Love, Regretful Eater
Dear Regretful Eater,
When I read your text message, I read, I have regret, How can I bounce back and why do I always find myself in this situation. First of all, you’re not alone. Right now, Many of us are basically thanksgiving dinner hopping. We have 6 thanksgivings by the time we even get to actual Thanksgiving day. We want to celebrate with all our family, in- laws, cousins, friends and co-workers so we eat 6 meals. Because of that we are often finding ourselves waking up with the regret of overeating. I think the first step to feeling better is letting yourself feel your regret. Letting yourself sit with it. Instead of numbing it down with a bacon, egg and cheese for breakfast. I think it’s also important to plan as much as possible during the holidays. And by planning I mean taking a couple minutes to yourself to be present in the moment, remember why you are at this meal instead of mindless eating. Then organize your meal the way you would your day. I agree, on holidays we sit down to eat at 2 pm and basically eat until 9 pm. So think of it that way, appetizers can feel like lunch. Let the next course feel like a snack. And the final course feel like dinner. It may slow you down. And no, it’s not socially awkward to stop eating after the first course because no one has any idea what you are choosing to eat. Everyone of us is fixated on our own meals. We should all feel very appreciative for the food the cooks have pre-pared and served so all the more reason to slow down and really savory the meal. We should spend some time before we even start eating to become aware of the food selection. I’m the first to roll my eyes when people say, look at the whole buffet before you fill your plate but it’s kind of true. And it actually kind of helps. And remember, we all struggle. We are in this together.
Love, Monday Dieter xoxo